Olive Quimby and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
by sean.p.ware
Summary: After watching Raiders of the Lost Ark with Fletcher during movie date night, Olive tells him that she dislikes the movie. Fletcher tries to get revenge on Olive by watching a favorite movie of hers. Sub-plot: Cole writes a letter to Chuck Norris saying that he will find him, then fears for his life after Catherine tells Cole that he will find him.
1. Chapter 1

**Olive Quimby and the Raiders of the Lost Ark**

**Hey, guys. sean. here bringing you another great episode of my **_**A.N.T. Farm **_**spin-off **_**Fletcher & Olive**_**. After watching **_**Raiders of the Lost Ark**_** with Fletcher during movie date night, Olive tells him that she dislikes the movie. Fletcher tries to get revenge on Olive by watching a favorite movie of hers. Sub-plot: Cole writes a letter to Chuck Norris saying that he will find him, then fears for his life after Catherine tells Cole that he will find him. This is going to be a good one. So here it is, **_**Olive Quimby and the Raiders of the Lost Ark**_**. Enjoy.**

**Scene One**

**Act One**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's house. 5:00PM, Friday. Queens, NY**

**(Olive is in the kitchen boiling some water for her tea. Fletcher enters the house)**

Fletcher: Hey sweetie.

Olive: Hi Fletcher. (Kisses him)

Fletcher: How was work?

Olive: Pretty good. I sold a couple of houses today. What about you?

Fletcher: I interviewed the mayor. What are you about to fix?

Olive: I'm about to fix some tea.

Fletcher: Herbal tea?

Olive: Yes.

Fletcher: You're fixing herbal tea?

Olive: Yeah.

Fletcher: Don't we have any regular tea?

Olive: We do.

Fletcher: Oh, well herbal tea is fine.

(Olive pours him a cup of tea. Gets some sugar cubes for the tea)

Olive: One lump or two?

Fletcher: You're not going to hit me in the head with a mallet like Bugs Bunny dressed as Granny?

Olive: No, I'm not going to hit you in the head.

Fletcher: Good.

(Olive gives Fletcher his cup of tea.)

Fletcher: Thanks.

Olive: You're welcome.

(Fletcher takes a few sips)

Fletcher: Oh, guess what tonight is?

Olive: Ooh is it Open Mike night at the city morgue?

Fletcher: Eww, no. It's date night movie night.

Olive: We're not going to watch _Spaceballs _are we?

Fletcher: No. I bought a few movies from Best Buy. I bought _Spooky Buddies, Ramona and Beezus, _and an instant classic _Raiders of the Lost Ark_.

Olive: Indiana Jones?

Fletcher: Yeah, I haven't seen that movie in a long time. It's the best movie by Steven Spielberg. Haven't you ever seen it?

Olive: I haven't seen it before. But I've read about it.

Fletcher: Oh Olive, you are going to enjoy this movie. I watched it with my parents when I was young. Trust me, you'll love this movie.

Olive: The last time I watched a movie with you, I watched George A. Romero's _Day of the Dead _and it had zombies in it. You know that I'm scared of zombies. That's one of my biggest fears.

Fletcher: Well, you didn't have to beat me up with the couch pillow after we watched that movie. You almost knocked my eye out.

(Olive rolls her eyes at Fletcher)

**(Cut to Cole's Apartment)**

**INT. Cole's apartment. 129 W. 81****st**** Street. New York, NY**

**(Cat sees Cole writing a letter)**

Cat: What are you doing?

Cole: Writing a letter.

Cat: To who?

Cole: Chuck Norris.

Cat: Chuck Norris.

Cole: Yeah.

Cat: Ooookay.

Cole: What?

Cat: Why would you write a letter to Chuck Norris? You don't even have his address.

Cole: Yes I do.

Cat: What?

Cole: My friend Marty Wolf knows Chuck Norris and he gave me his address so I can write to him. So, I thought it was a good time to write to him.

Cat: Good luck with that.

Cole: Why, thank you Cat.

Cat: By the way, what does it say on the letter.

(Cole starts reading the letter)

Cole: P.S. I am going to find you.

Cat: Are you out of your mind?!

Cole: What?

Cat: You're crazy.

Cole: So?

Cat: Don't you know that if you try to find Chuck Norris, he'll find you?

Cole: Oh, it's just a joke.

Cat: Really? Well, I hope that he comes looking for you and tries to hurt you. I'll make sure to get this on YouTube so everybody could see you humiliating beat down from Chuck Norris. Well, see you tomorrow. (Leaves Cole's apartment)

Cole: He'll find me, that's a joke.

**End of Act One**

**Act Two**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's House**

**(**_**Raiders of the Lost Ark goes off**_**. Fletcher turns off the TV)**

Fletcher: That was a good movie. I forgot how good that movie was. Maybe it's because I've haven't seen it in a long time.

Olive: Yes and no.

Fletcher: Yeah, it's pretty…what the hell did you just say?

Olive: Harrison Ford's a good actor and George Lucas and Steven Spielberg make a great team, but I didn't understand a lick of it. I mean what's the deal with the ark? Does it have any special powers? I just don't get it. And why do the Nazis wants to see what's in the ark so they can give it to Hitler?

Fletcher: But it's a great movie. The scene with the opening of the ark was pretty cool, especially when Belloq's head exploding. A bit graphic for a PG movie, but very cool. And it tells us a very good lesson, never underestimate the power of God.

Olive: The visual effects were great. You gotta love Richard Edlund's work on that movie. I love his visual effects on Star Wars, _The Empire Strikes Back_, _Return of the Jedi_, _Poltergeist_, _Poltergeist II: The Other Side_, _Ghostbusters_, _Legal Eagles_, _Battlestar Galactica The Movie_, _Fright Night_ the original, _Big Trouble in Little China_, _Masters of_ _the Universe_, _The Monster Squad_, _Die Hard_, _Ghost_, _The Judas Project_, _Alien 3_, _Air_ _Force One_ and much more.

Fletcher: So what's wrong with the movie?

Olive: I didn't get it.

Fletcher: You don't get it? You idiot!

Olive: Hey, I'm just expressing my opinion. I didn't like the movie. So if you don't like it if I don't like a movie I like, then maybe we shouldn't have movie night date night together.

Fletcher: Fine.

Olive: Fine.

Fletcher: Fine!

Olive: Fine! (Goes upstairs to their bedroom and slams the door)

Fletcher: Geez, it's a good thing that we didn't watch _The Room_.

**End of Act Two**

**So that's scene one of Olive Quimby. So what did you think of it? How will Fletcher feel about Olive disliking the movie? We'll find out next time on the next scene. Don't forget to review this story (No Bad Reviews) and I'll see you next time. Till next time my fellow readers.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Olive Quimby and the Raiders of the Lost Ark**

**Hey, guys. I'm back bringing you another scene of this great story. Last time, Fletcher and Olive have a movie date night together and Olive tells Fletcher that she disliked his favorite movie. Meanwhile, Cole writes a letter to Chuck Norris. Now today, Fletcher tries to come up with a plan to get revenge on Olive and Cole gets a letter from Chuck Norris. Let's see the hilarity ensue today. Enjoy.**

**Scene Two**

**Act One**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's house. 11:00AM. Saturday**

**(Fletcher is in the kitchen pouring himself a cup of coffee. Chyna enters)**

Chyna: Hey Fletcher.

Fletcher: Hey. I do not like my wife.

Chyna: What? Why?

Fletcher: She upset me. I just want to slap that little savage in the face. Here's an interesting factoid for you. Interesting factoid…I HATE HER!

Chyna: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down and take a deep breath.

(Fletcher calms down)

Chyna: Alright, now tell me what's going on.

Fletcher: That blue-eyed blonde brainiac is the worst person that I've ever married. I wish I didn't marry her!

Chyna: I said calmly.

Fletcher: If she wasn't my wife I'd slap her in the face!

Chyna: I said calmly!

**(Meanwhile, with Cat and Olive)**

**INT. Cat's Apartment**

Olive: I can't believe Fletcher.

Cat: Uh-oh, what did he do?

Olive: We were watching _Raiders of the Lost Ark _last night for our date night movie night. After the movie ended, I told him that I didn't like it and he starts going off like a movie critic.

Cat: What a big baby.

Olive: I know. Who does he think he is, Sheldon Cooper?

Cat: What a nerd.

Olive: Hey!

Cat: No offense.

Olive: This is worse then the time you poured Champaign on my head at New Years Eve.

Cat: (Laughs) Good times. Good times.

**(Back to Fletcher and Chyna)**

Fletcher: Who does my wife think she is Siskel and Ebert?

Chyna: No idea, I'll talk to her.

Fletcher: Chyna, she disliked my favorite movie! Who is she Amy?!

Chyna: Relax.

Fletcher: I don't know if I could relax. Hell, I don't know if I love her anymore.

Chyna: Don't turn into Sheldon.

Fletcher: Are you calling me Sheldon Cooper?

Chyna: Yes.

Fletcher: Shut up, music gal.

Chyna: It's true: You're starting to act like him too. You go berserk over Olive hating your favorite movie.

Fletcher: Oh please, Chyna. That's not true.

Chyna: It so is true!

Fletcher: Again, shut up!

Chyna: Hey, don't take your anger out on me you married her! (Crosses her arms at Fletcher)

Fletcher: Since she doesn't like my favorite movie, maybe I'll dislike her favorite movie. She likes the movie _Gremlins 2: The New Batch_. Tomorrow, we'll both watch it tomorrow and I'll show her what it's like to mess with a guy who loves his movies.

Chyna: I don't know what's stupid. You or that plan of yours.

**The Next Day**

**INT. Cole's Apartment**

Cat: Cole.

Cole: Yeah.

Cat: Did you send that letter to Chuck Norris?

Cole: Yeah.

Cat: We'll see what happens.

Cole: What are you trying to say, Catherine?

Cat: Chuck Norris finds you!

Cole: What?!

Cat: Yep.

Cole: Oh no. Why didn't you stop me from sending the letter?!

Cat: You were being an idiot! You had no business sending that letter to him. I guess you have to star planning your last day on Earth because you're going to be a dead man. Oh Cole, I really enjoyed dating you. I guess I should move on and start dating that handsome neighbor of mine in my building. See ya! (Leaves Cole's apartment.)

Cole: Oh crap. Oh crap. Oh Crap! (Tries to hide in fear)

**(Meanwhile, at Fletcher and Olive's House)**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's House**

(Olive comes downstairs and enters the kitchen)

Olive: Hi Fletcher.

Fletcher: Well if it isn't Siskel and Ebert. What movie are you going to criticize today _Gremlins 2 _or _Halloween III: Season of the Witch_ because I love that movie.

Olive: That movie was good. They probably shouldn't have made _Halloween III_.

Fletcher: Good point for once.

Olive: Look Fletcher, I just didn't care for _Raiders of the Lost Ark_.

Fletcher: Oh brother.

Olive: Fletcher!

Fletcher: Huh?

Olive: Could you please shut up?

Fletcher: You shut up.

**(Cut to Cole's Apartment)**

(Cat enters Cole's apartment and notice Cole hiding behind the couch)

Cat: Cole, what are you doing?

Cole: I'm hiding from he-who-must-not-be-named.

Cat: Lord Moldbutt.

(Glass breaks. Cole and Cat noticed the broken vase on the coffee table)

Cole: What is this, a cartoon?

Cat: Are you talking about Chuck Norris?

Announcer: A-Chucka Norris!

Cole: What the hell was that?

Cat: No idea. Why are you hiding from him?

Cole: I'm afraid that he's after me.

Cat: Oh brother.

Cole: Besides, I don't want Chuck Norris…

Announcer: A-Chucka Norris!

Cole: There it goes again!

Cat: This is too weird.

**End of Act One**

**Act Two**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's House**

(Olive enters the living room and sits down on the couch. Fletcher is sitting on a chair)

Olive: Hi Fletchie. (Smiles at Fletcher)

(Fletcher doesn't say anything to her)

Olive: Aw, come on.

Fletcher: Do I hear something? (Walks into the kitchen. Olive follows him)

Olive: Fletcher, please answer me.

Fletcher: (Picks up bug spray) Is there a fly in the house?

Olive: Give me that! (Takes the can away from him)

Fletcher: Good thing I have an extra can. (Sprays at Olive)

Olive: (Coughs) You jerk! I think you sprayed me in the face!

Fletcher: Well good. You deserved it. You're lucky it wasn't pepper spray.

Olive: Idiot! How long are you going to be mad at me? This is getting too stupid.

Fletcher: You're stupid, stupid.

Olive: Oh, that's very mature.

Fletcher: Why would I be married to a woman with an eidetic memory who doesn't like _Raiders_?

Olive: I just didn't understand the movie. Now, can we watch _Gremlins 2_ tonight? I won't complain about the movie.

Fletcher: Fine, let's watch _Gremlins 2_.

(Cole enters and looks out the window)

Cole: Fletcher, I'm in big trouble. He's after me.

Fletcher: Who? Is it Lord Moldybutt?

(Glass breaks)

Olive: (Gasps) Fletcher! You said his name!

Cole: No! Not Lord Moldybutt!

(Window breaks)

Olive: Shut up.

Fletcher: Who's after you, Michael Bay?

(Microwave explodes. They all stare confused, wondering how that happened)

Fletcher: Okay, that was weird. Every time I say Michael…

Olive: Shut up! I don't want the house to explode every time you say Michael Bay!

(Cole's car explodes)

Cole: Aw crap! That was my car!

(Runs out of the house)

Fletcher: Okay, let's not say that guy's name ever again.

Olive: Yeah.

**End of Act Two**

**Will Fletcher get even with Olive? Will this be Cole's last day on Earth? We'll find out next time on **_**Fletcher & Olive**_**. Don't forget to review this story (No Bad Reviews) and I'll see you next time for scene three. Till next time my fellow readers.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Olive Quimby and the Raiders of the Lost Ark**

**Hi, everybody! This is it, it's the battle of all battles. It's husband vs. wife. It's the battle of the sexes. It's beauty vs. beast. It's Coke vs. Pepsi. It's Fletcher vs. Olive! Fletcher is going to get even with Olive. Also, it's Cole Szell vs. Chuck Norris. I hope an announcer doesn't say A-Chucka Norris. LOL. Who will win this battle? We'll find out today in scene three. Enjoy.**

**Scene Three**

**Act One**

**INT. Fletcher and Olive's House, Night**

(Fletcher and Olive are sitting on the couch watching _Gremlins 2: The New Batch_)

Fletcher: Is that Frank Langella playing the mad scientist in the science lab at Clamp Industries?

Olive: Actually, that's Christopher Lee. Interesting factoid about Frank Langella and Christopher Lee is that Christopher Lee played Dracula in the Hammer films and Frank Langella played Dracula in John Badham's 1979 version of the movie_ Dracula_.

Fletcher: Something I actually didn't know for once.

Olive: Gotta love Jerry Goldsmith's Gremlins theme, it's much better than the original.

Fletcher: How so?

Olive: Fletcher, it's 1990. You're supposed to make the Gremlins Rag more upbeat. Hellooo!

Fletcher: Oh. You do know they're kind of parodying the first movie.

Olive: Yeah, that's why I saw Leonard Maltin in the movie.

Fletcher: The Gremlins wanted revenge on him for disliking the first one. (Thinking to himself and smiles) Yeah, I'm going to be like Leonard Maltin and get my revenge on you, my loving wife. Who is the jerk in the suit?

Olive: That's Forrester, you nitwit. He's played by Robert Picardo. Interesting factoid about Robert Picardo is that him and director Joe Dante collaborated in films such as _Explorers_, _Innerspace_, _The Burbs_, _Matinee_…

Fletcher: Can we just watch the movie without you saying another interesting factoid?

(Olive looks hurt)

Announcer: Interesting factoid about Olive…

Fletcher: SHUT UP!

Announcer: Oh, sorry.

Olive: Fine.

(Fletcher looks confused)

Fletcher: Why is that gremlin talking like a human being?

Olive: He drank that brain serum which makes him intelligent. He's known as the "Brain" gremlin, played by Tony Randall.

Fletcher: Felix from _The Odd Couple_?

Olive: Yeah.

Fletcher: I hope he doesn't say any you-know-whats.

Olive: Just watch it.

(They continue to watch the movie)

Fletcher: Oh, are you serious?! The movie is acting up. Olive your movie is…what the heck? What. The. Heck! Gremlins took over the movie!

Olive: Don't worry, Hulk Hogan is going to save the day.

Fletcher: C'mon, this movie stinks!

(Olive turns off the movie)

Olive: It does not stink!

Fletcher: It does to me.

Olive: I enjoy it. So stop crying.

**End of Act One**

**Act Two**

**INT. Cole's Apartment, Night**

(Cat enters Cole's apartment and starts looking for him.)

Cat: Cole. Cole, are you in here?

Cole: Yeah.

Cat: What are you doing?

Cole: Hiding.

Cat: Oh, brother.

Cole: You-know-who is coming.

Cat: Michael Bay.

(Cole's TV explodes)

Cole: (Looks at his TV) My TV! Great, now I'm going to miss a new episode of _Revenge_! You're buying me a new one!

Cat: Oh boy.

Cole: C.N. is after me.

Cat: Cartoon Network is after you? Was it because you wrote an angry letter to them after they cancelled _Incredible Crew_?

Cole: CHUCK NORRIS!

Announcer: A-Chucka Norris!

**(At Fletcher & Olive's house)**

(Olive turns off the movie)

Olive: That was a good movie.

Fletcher: It's a horrible movie. If I want to see a Gremlin, I'll go to the Gremlin in Russia.

Olive: It's Kremlin, you idiot. There aren't any gremlins in the Kremlin.

Fletcher: There were gremlins in a World War II cartoon.

Olive: It might've been in _Looney Toons_.

Fletcher: I'm not sure if it was.

Olive: Anyway, I liked it.

Fletcher: Booo! (Gives Olive two thumbs down)

Olive: SHUT UP, FLETCHER!

Fletcher: Who do you think I am, Paisley?

Olive: No, she was way dumber than you'll ever be.

Fletcher: Well it's a good thing that I chose her instead of you as my partner at Home Ec.

Olive: Be quiet.

Fletcher: The point is, what was Joe Dante thinking? That guy makes his movies comedic instead of sci-fi and horror.

Olive: I love Joe Dante's movies. Instead of _Piranha_. It's too campy.

Fletcher: Didn't he do a _Looney Toons_ movie?

Olive: Yes, he did.

Fletcher: It was interesting, but the villain was kinda lame.

Olive: But the villain was hilarious.

Fletcher: Now you know how I feel when you dislike a favorite movie of mine.

Olive: (Gets up from the couch) Wait a minute, you did all of this just to get even with me?

Fletcher: Yeah.

(Olive slaps Fletcher in the face)

Olive: How could you?! I can't believe that you did this. You're being such a big baby about me disliking a movie that you like and you disliking a movie that I love. I can't watch another movie with you. Maybe I should just watch a movie with Cat and Chyna and never watch a movie with you ever again. I'm going to bed. You really hurt me tonight.

Fletcher: Olive, wait.

(Olive stops going upstairs)

Fletcher: The reason I was trying to get revenge on you is because you disliked _Raiders of the Lost Ark_. It really upset me. I'm sorry that I hurt you. If you don't want to watch another movie with me, I understand.

(Olive walks over to Fletcher and sits down next to him)

Olive: Fletcher. I'm sorry that I disliked your movie. That was really rude of me. I knew you like that movie and you know that I liked _Gremlins 2_. I hope you can forgive me and I hope we can watch another movie together.

Fletcher: I forgive you.

(Kisses Olive. Olive rests her head on Fletcher's shoulder)

Fletcher: Hey. Why don't we watch a romantic drama together?

Olive: That sounds like a great idea. I just love seeing you cry while watching a movie.

Fletcher: I didn't cry.

Olive: Oh Fletcher. (Playfully hits Fletcher and smiles)

**(Cole's Apartment)**

(Someone knocks on his door)

Cole: Who is it?

Voice: Chuck Norris.

Cole: Oh great.

Voice: I would like to talk to you.

Cole: (Picks up his baseball bat) Cole I have a bat and I'm not afraid to use it.

Voice: I would like to talk to you.

Cole: Fine.

(Cole gets ready)

Cole: Enter.

(Cole opens the door and yells like a crazy person and prepares to hit the mysterious person. The mysterious person is revealed to be Cat)

Cat: Cole, stop!

Cole: Cat!

Cat: It's fine. It's just me.

Cole: What the?

Cat: Chuck Norris is not coming.

Cole: Then why are you here?

Cat: It's because. Because I'm Chuck Norris.

Cole: What?

Cat: I'm Chuck Norris. I used the voice app on my zPhone to disguise my voice as Chuck Norris' voice.

(Cat pulls out her zPhone and uses the voice app)

Cat: (As Chuck Norris) Hi Cole. It's me, Chuck Norris.

Cole: Why'd you do that?

Cat: I just want to mess with your tiny little mind. (Laughs at Cole)

Cole: Why I oughta!

Cat: Uh-oh!

(Cat starts running away from Cole)

Cole: Come here! I know where you live!

**End of Act Two**

**So that's it for this great Fletcher & Olive story. Did you enjoy it? There will be more Fletcher & Olive spin-off stories to come so stick around. Don't forget to review this story (No Bad Reviews) and don't forget to review the Pilot of Fletcher & Olive. See you next time. Till next time my fellow readers.**


End file.
